Pirates of the Caribbean 4 Review: Worse Things Happen On DVD

The Pirates of the Caribbean series has, at times, been difficult to get through. The first film was a fun ride with twists, turns and zombie pirates with the second and third bringing convoluted plots, poor characterization and stunning visual effects. Now we arrive at the fourth instalment with a new director, Rob Marshall, Johnny Depp playing the lead rather than the wacky support and a potential love interest for Captain Jack Sparrow in the form of Penelope Cruz.

On Stranger Tides sees Captain Jack go on an expedition to find the fountain of youth with ex-girlfriend Angelica (Cruz) and her infamous pirate father, Blackbeard (Ian McShane). It has been foretold that Blackbeard will meet his death at the hands of a one-legged man, a description that Jack’s old enemy Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush) now fits. Do It!

8 Million Ways To Die Review: 1 Down…

8 Million Ways To Die: On General Release From Monday 12th September

You might think that based on the cast list alone, Hal Ashby’s 8 Million Ways to Die is something of a hidden gem. Jeff Bridges takes on leading man duties, having been nominated for an Oscar two years before in Starman. Andy Garcia plays the villain after having made an impression on the small screen and Rosanna Arquette stars as the hooker with a heart after receiving positives reviews from her appearance in After Hours. You might think it’s a winning combination. How wrong can you be?

Based (loosely) on the novels of Lawrence Block, the film follows Detective Matt Scudder (Bridges) who spirals into alcoholism after killing a drug dealer when a bust goes sour. After losing his job and his family in a lengthy montage, Scudder winds up making friends with needy hooker, Sunny. Her reasons for needling her way into his life are soon revealed when she’s murdered by a mystery assailant while in Scudder’s care. Unable to cope with another death on his hands, Scudder resolves to catch Sunny’s killer with the help of her friend Sarah (Arquette). Do It!

Jane Eyre Review: Tough Love

Jane Eyre: On General Release From Friday 9th September

The chill in the air and the grey sky above me tells me that soon we shall be fully immersed in the most wonderful time of year: Oscar season. Yes, it’s almost time for leading ladies to play down their looks and work with an accent while the gents will parade around as emotionally damaged men with an enormous obstacle to overcome. Of course no Oscar season would be complete without the obligatory period piece and the latest adaptation of Jane Eyre is this year’s first entry.

Director Cary Fukunaga first had the industry buzzing after the success of his feature debut, Sin Nombre, but he’d clearly managed to say the right things to the right people as he won the job of director on Jane Eyre. He may not be an obvious choice of director for a British classic but he’s a damn good one. Do It!

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 Review: The One With All The Fighting…

Harry Potter and the deathly Hallows Part 2 is on General Release on Friday 15th July.

The Potter series is finally over but boy does it go out with a bang. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 picks up right where the previous instalment left off and heads straight into two action packed hours of wand waving, dragon riding and Horcrux destroying.

It’s impossible to describe just how much this franchise means to fans across the globe and the final film really should be the cherry on the cake, but what film can live up to those kind of expectations? Well, this one can, actually, but only just. Do It!

Bridesmaids Review: The Marrying Kind

Bridesmaids: On General Release From Friday 24th June

One of the rules of screenwriting is ‘Make your protagonist likeable’. It’s an old rule that really works and I’ve rarely seen it broken, or broken well to make me rethink its validity. In Kristin Wiig’s Bridesmaids, however, her character, long-time fuck-up Annie, is dangerously close to the edge of being a total dick. She’s selfish, disorganised, rude and self-destructive – not traditional qualities you look for in a leading lady, especially not one that’s the maid of honour for her best friend Lillian, played by Maya Rudolph. Do It!

Stake Land Review: Fangs Very Much

Stake Land: On General Release on Friday 17th June

In a celluloid landscape consisting of superheroes and sparkly bloodsuckers, you probably thought you had just made it out of Spring’s cinematic dumping ground when along came another bloody vampire film, Stake Land. But after watching it, you may find yourself eating your prejudicial words because Stake Land is measured, beautiful and balanced with lashings of blood and vicious vampire action.

In the aftermath of a vampire outbreak, orphaned teenager Martin (Gossip Girl’s Connor Paolo) traverses a now inhospitable American landscape. It’s now made up of abandoned cities, ghost towns, empty highways and small communities of people banding together, trying to survive, with his companion and protector, Mister (Nick Damici). Do It!

Attack The Block Review: Hoodie Goodie

Attack The Block: On General Release 11 May

Kids today, eh? If they’re not selling drugs or mugging people they’re fending off an alien attack, at least that’s the story in Joe Cornish’s directorial debut, Attack the Block.

Set in the grimey council estates of ‘Sahhhf Lahndan’, off-duty nurse Sam (Jodie Whittaker) is on her way home when a gang ‘murk’ her. NOTE: In order to translate the script of this film, you may need to spend a week reading the entire Urban Dictionary beforehand. In the middle of this murking, an asteroid destroys a nearby car, the gang’s leader, Moses (John Boyega), investigates only to be attacked by the alien creature lurking in the wreckage. Do It!

Limitless Review: Limited

Limitless (TBC): On General Release From Wednesday 23rd March

The Hangover was one of the biggest comedies of the decade, the A-Team promotional ads were everywhere and he’s appeared in numerous romantic comedies but people still don’t seem to know who Bradley Cooper is. All that looks set to change as he takes the lead in director Neil Burger’s drug thriller, Limitless.

Cooper plays down-and-out author Eddie Morra who’s been wrestling with a bad case of writer’s block which has put a strain on his relationship with Lindy (Abbie Cornish). She’s had enough of his layabout, struggling artist ways and breaks it off with him. Feeling lost and dejected, Eddie runs into his ex-brother-in-law Vernon, a dodgy drug rep who gives Eddie a free sample of NZT. The little clear pill allows users to access 100% of their brain’s full potential and although no one in their right mind would accept a cup of tea from sleazy Vernon, Eddie accepts the NZT, no questions asked. Do It!

Rango Review: West Is Best

RANGO (PG): On General Release From Friday 4th March

Gore Verbinksi, best known for the Pirates of the Caribbean series, takes his first step into the weird and wonderful world of animation and he’s taking them with the very weird and the exceedingly wild Johnny Depp. They come together once again to bring life to Rango, an animated Western for kids which for some bizarre reason is also a drama about one chameleon’s (Depp) identity crisis. These two elements don’t always sit comfortably together but it’s definitely an interesting experiment.

The film opens with Rango performing a monologue in which he reveals that he’s struggling with feeling lost and alone in what appears to be a dreamlike desert where his only friends are a wind-up fish toy and a headless Barbie. In reality, he’s a pet chameleon travelling in the back of a car which, thanks to a pesky armadillo, is thrown from the car and left to his own devices. This is one of the best openings to a film I’ve ever seen, almost on par with Toy Story 3 and that’s going some. The sun hits Rango’s terrarium as it flies through the air like a light at the end of the tunnel signals freedom, sweet and terrible freedom. Do It!

The Long, Hot Summer DVD Review: Sizzling

Michael Ritt’s Southern drama ‘The Long, Hot Summer’ sees Paul Newman get good and sweaty but will the DVD release get you hot under the collar?

It’s easy to just think of Paul Newman as just Hollywood mancandy because it’s so easy to get lost in his sparkling baby blues but his performance in ‘The Long, Hot Summer’ shows off his muscles, both acting and physical. Newman plays Ben Quick, a man with a reputation as a barn-burner who thanks to an accusation is forced to up sticks and find a new home.

In need of a job, he turns to the richest family in the small picturesque town of Frenchman’s Bend, the Varners, lead by the big and blustery Will Varner (Orson Welles). He’s demanding, unfair and pushy but is downright infuriating when pressuring daughter Clara (Joanne Woodward) to get married and start churning out babies. Do It!