*Growly voice* Justice never sleeps. Criminals think they’re above the law. Well, I am the law.

*Cough* Yeah OK Batman impressions may not be our forte but I had to give it a go when we heard that someone who tried to film The Dark Knight in a cinema has been prosecuted.

According to DigitalSpy, Robert Henderson from Missouri has been ordered to pay $24,738 (£15,982) in damages for selling a pirated copy of The Dark Knight on DVD. He’s also getting two years jail time. Ouch.

You see kids; crime does pay. It pays the people who got hurt by your crime when they drag your ass to court. Especially when those people are Warner Bros.

Mike Robinson of the MPAA said, “This is an appropriate sentence for a very serious crime, and we hope it will serve as a warning to would-be movie thieves that they will face severe consequences for engaging in these activities.”

Also known as ‘Suck it movie thieves!’

Amanda Seyfried, star of the upcoming thriller Chloe, has signed on for a new adaptation of Red Riding Hood.

According to the LA Times, Seyfried will play the title role in a retelling of the Brothers Grimm fairytale, to be helmed by Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke.

The film will be called The Girl With The Red Riding Hood and will be penned by generically named David Johnson and produced by Leonardo Di Caprio’s company Appian Way.

Hopefully this film will be a dark version as we’re tired of seeing Seyfried in shiny happy dramas; she’ll be appearing in the upcoming Dear John and Letters To Juliet. I want more stuff like Chloe where she displays more dramatic chops and a dark underbelly (amongst other things).

Well it seems that the Oscar nominated actors are having a good time of it because after they got a nod from the Academy they’re signing on to some interesting projects.

Penelope Cruz just signed on to what will undoubtedly be a huge money spinner, Pirates Of The Caribbean 4. Christoph Waltz joins Water For Elephants and now Jeremy Renner is getting in on the action.

According to the New York Times, the star of The Hurt Locker has reportedly signed on to join The Raven; a fictional account of Edgar Allen Poe’s life mixed with mystery and murder. Ewan McGregor, star of the upcoming Ghost Writer, is also attached to the project but it’s not confirmed.

Renner has also been chatting with Hancock director Peter Berg about signing up for a leading role Battleship that Berg plans to launch in 2012. Look who’s Mr. Popular.

Everyone’s favourite Nazi Christoph Waltz has signed on to star in I Am Legend director Francis Lawrence’s Water For Elephants, according to reports from DeadlineHollywood.

The Inglourious Basterds star will reportedly play a paranoid schizophrenic animal trainer in a circus. Um, OK.

The movie will also star Twilight’s Robert Pattinson as a veterinary student who falls for the circus’ star performer and Waltz’s wife, played by Reese Witherspoon.

Based on the novel by Sara Gruen, the script was penned by Richard LaGravanese, writer of the upcoming Chronicles Of Narnia: Voyage Of The Dawn Treader.

I couldn’t be happier for Waltz; he’s moved straight into the big leagues with his Oscar nominated performance of Colonel Landa in Basterds, to signing on to The Green Hornet, The Talking Cure and now this. Well done.

I guess it’s been a while since I had a sleepover and watched Shakespeare In Love but still, I just don’t think that Gwyneth Paltrow is such a great actress.

I’ll admit that I have enjoyed many of her performances – she was fine in Iron Man and The Royal Tenebaums was great but on the whole she’s not my fave. And though there are many actresses who are much worse than her (Jessica Alba), I never get excited when we hear that Gwynie has been cast in something.

According to DeadlineHollywood, the star is joining Matt Damon, Kate Winslet, Marion Cotillard and Jude Law on Steven Soderbergh’s thriller Contagion. Now I’m interested.

Most of the details of the project are under wraps but I do know that it’s being written by The Informant’s scribe, Scott Z Burns and is set for a 2011 release.

In the meantime, I’m off to re-watch Sliding Doors. I want to love you Gwynie, I really do.

Finally, Kristen Wiig will be getting her own starring vehicle in the shape of a wedding comedy and Judd Apatow has signed on to produce.

The SNL star has written and will star in an untitled comedy that sees a group of women fighting it out in order to host a friend’s wedding. Now the project has the backing of funnyman Judd Apatow, it should really get moving now.

This will be Wiig’s first lead role but before production starts she’ll be getting plenty of practice in; she’s got several films coming out in the next year, most notably Pegg and Frost’s Paul and How To Train Your Dragon.

The project will also be giving director Paul Frieg a leg up in the game; so far he’s mostly directed TV comedies like the US Office, 30 Rock and Arrested Development. With a mix of Apatow, Wiig and Freig, this project looks better and better.